PRIVILEGE Campo Style

Rubia, pelo bueno, ay dios bendiga, blanca…. The number of words to describe one’s whiteness are truly unlimited in the Dominican Republic. Normally, I find nothing but pride in my Latino roots and emphasize the importance of my mestizo blood, but here on the island appearance is what matters, and to the people of my campo I am WHITE. Whiteness embodied on this island comes with a type of privilege that I am not used to nor comfortable with. The amount of comments, words and general favors given because of the color of my skin are astounding. The question then arises, how do we use that privilege to make a difference? Because effective awareness of one’s white privilege is necessary in any context, especially in that of the Dominican Republic.

Living on the border I am not a stranger to tense race relations and a very much racially divided society. However, I wake up daily, aware of the privileges granted to me on this island, in my own country and around the world. Making sure to keep my privilege in check, I question, how can I be the best ally on the island? My steps have been to:

1. Talk to fellow volunteers of color whose service is undeniably different than mine.
2. Secondly, to remind my community that one’s skin color does not make me or any other “white person” more beautiful.
3. And lastly, to remind (especially the girls in my school) that empowerment does not come with lighter skin; empowerment comes through education and with education and passion, anything is achievable.

It’s a role that at times would be easier to accept the privileges than to give into the responsibilities that inherently tie in with being a white American. My community, my region and the country as a whole have very different ideas that do not always align with my attempts at ally-ship and behavior change. Neither do they see the importance of using a type of power that is inherently granted to the lighter or fairer skinned population to better the population as a whole?????.

To fellow volunteers, remember we are guests in this country, we are here to serve our communities but while doing so we have the power to make our voices heard. People want to listen to us, we are new, “Americana” is so big in this country and our direct knowledge of pop culture gives us a unique voice in front of our youth. When something uncontrollable like the color of our skin is giving us a voice, we cannot simply ignore the identifiers that accompanies it. We must emphasize the fact that the color of one’s skin is not a factor in one’s worth. We must stand up and assert ourselves as allies and friends. We cannot allow our privileges to make us content in living in a society in which we are seen to be better. Because we aren’t.

We have our individual cultural identities but for what we are lacking in melanin we must make up for in acceptance, tolerance and overall inclusion. We must use our voices in our communities to teach inclusion and to teach general lessons of individual beauty. We have to work harder to show our communities the beauty that lies in every shade of every person on this island. In doing so, when we return to the USA we can use these lessons/experiences to become BETTER allies in our country where racial divides, hate and separation seem to be ever present.

Dios Bendiga… Santa Maria

Oh, Santa Maria. Santa Maria. Like anything you aren’t perfect, you aren’t always great. You challenge me, you have let me grow. You have taught me a lot about my life. You have taught me that the best intentions can often go unnoticed and unappreciated. You have let me grow by showing me the brightest and darkest parts of you. You have opened up to me. I have found my family, my friends and my circle of confianza here in Santa Maria. I have learned more about my comfort zones and what it means to be challenged in the last 4 months than in 22 years. The more I know the more I love, care and feel invested in this community.

The weirdest things happen as Peace Corps volunteers, you find challenges appealing, opportunity struggle and pride in ever battle. The last four months have been anything but easy, but every day there are beautiful moments. I introduce a child to their first book, seeing the shining look in their eyes as they see the power in imagination and the fun in a story. I have learned to sit and talk, every day with new people, learning to take time to be ok with not being busy and being open with people. I have encountered two stomach borne illnesses in the form of parasites and intestinal infections, and have learned that medical Spanish is… hard. I have felt support from home in the form of care packages for community members and supportive venting sessions with my mom, who never fails to support my forever idealistic way of being. Prouder than ever to have a mom with a heart so open to supporting my projects, my kiddos and my dreams. These past four months have been full of many hugs, high fives and building of new relationships. My heart has opened and I am inspired like never before.

It’s time to take on the next two years with this mentality, strength and open mindedness to take on every adventure and every struggle as an opportunity for growth.

Coffee moments… A look at Dominican Culture through the Eyes of a Caffeine Lover

 

As a lover of all things coffee related I thought it would be only appropriate to address the topic that has come up every day for me here. Cafe or COFFEE. Dominicans grow a large portion of the world’s coffee crop on their island, and when I arrived in country I assumed I would not only be consuming large portions of coffee all day but that I would also have so much of it that I would be literally swimming in the different types of coffee beans I would discover. Well.. let’s just say I was wrong on all accounts.

My first night in the house of my first host family I decided I would go with the flow and I had assumed would be consuming liters of coffee in the morning just the way I did at home. But that did not happen. In the morning, I woke up to find a coffee cup that seemed to be the size of my thumb and the depth of my belly button full of sugar laced “coffee”. I was distraught but to save face I let it go, chugged my sugar cup and struggled to make it through the first hour of my day.

The coffee here is cooked on the stove and in small portions, two descriptors I didn’t even know went with coffee in the first place. I was instructed to discuss this topic with my Dona (an endearing term used for the mothers/grandmothers that literally make the world go around in the DR) and as soon as the topic of coffee was brought up, she began laughing, only to say “Los americanos y café…que interesante”. The next morning to my delight I was met with a coffee cup a little bit bigger filled hallway with black coffee. Let’s just say it was probably the proudest achievement of my life at that point. Not because it was coffee (which IS vital to my existence) but because I could use my local resources and Spanish to articulate that I wanted something different. Not to mention the next day the “luz se fue” which is very typical here and without lights or gas my Doña made my coffee on a plancha or iron, to ensure that I would have my black cup of coffee.

This was an enlightening experience for me as well, because I assumed that because café was such a big export of the country that they too would be as in love with the coffee bean as I am. I learned so much about the dedication of Dominican society to ensure that their guests and extensions of their family are treated well and with the upmost courtesy.

 After spending more than 3 months here I can say that this is one of the things  I have loved the most and one of the things that I hope to pick up and take with me in 2+ years.. Si dios quiere. 

I have learned a lot here including, that assumptions, even educated ones learned from reading material or cultural books never can really do the Dominican Republic justice. I have learned that culture is truly a beautiful and forever evolving concept and the people of the DR are not able to be put into any one category. After a couple of days in a much rural campo I am really able to see the evolution and development of Dominican society and the differences that lie within a city, pueblo and campo life. I am sure that throughout my service there will be many “coffee moments” for me but I am looking forward to learning from the people around me and taking every lesson back to my friends and family in the US to teach them a little more about this country I will be calling home for the next two years.

 

PS… I apologize to everyone for slacking on this post, as I wrote it more than 6 weeks ago. It was a long and crazy process getting through the training process, moving around the country and now settling into my site in Santa Maria, Monte Cristi (blog post to follow).

 

11 days later…

There comes a time in your life where everything you know is proved to be a little off. Everything I thought I knew about the world has proved to be skewed ever so slightly by the fact that I have lived my life to date in the United States in what I can only think of now as a bubble. I had everything I needed, parents who provided me with the best opportunities and an overall comfortable life. I would say that in all fairness that is not what I have now. I am beginning to realize that this is reality for me and that that’s ok. I have adopted the idea that nothing is truly better, good or bad. During this adjustment period everything for me just is (with the exception of a few things I will get to). I have collected over 100 mosquito bites, learned to depend on dry shampoo and spoken Spanish every day for the past 11 days. It makes the days seem longer, but not in a bad way. My days seem to be longer because of the amount of overdrive that my brain is having to work, but again that is not a bad thing. When I was in university I realized that a lot of what I was learning was firstly in my native tongue and secondly information that I had prior knowledge about. Neither one of those things applies currently, as I begin my journey here in the DR. Again, this is not a bad thing just a sign of development. I have figured out ways to handle the adjustment and have made a conscious effort every day to do something fun after my classes to ensure that my brain has a period of rest and relaxation so to speak.

 

I have hope that this will not be the way my entire service goes just because I have heard from every  PCV or Peace Corps Volunteer in country that the overwhelming amount of information comes from training. For now though, the information is vital and the training staff ensures that we have fun activities like learning the meringue and bachata dances as well as becoming domino’s champs and daily lessons on what makes Dominican culture so beautiful. I am so beyond honored to be a part of this training team, and every day am shocked at how open and culturally sound my cohort is. It’s amazing to see some of the best America has to offer from all different walks of life here. The 34 of us are already becoming so close, it’s a good indicator of how the Peace Corps unites not only the US with the site country, but Americans with Americans. We are able to laugh at ourselves and I think that is one of the things that we have learned will prove to be most important. Whether it comes to our Spanish comprehension or just life in general here and our inability to flush our toilets, we have united.

 These two pictures are  just a couple of the amazing sites in the ZONA COLONIAL which is the first location and establishment Christopher Columbus has in the new world.                                                                         

This is obviously the first Dennys to grace the New World.                                                  

This is a little picture of my trip to the big Peace Corps HQ office in Santo Domingo this past week!

It’s only been 11 days and my life has already changed, I can’t even imagine what the next couple of years will be like. But I am already changing for the better.  

 

 

Adios America, Adios a todos?

The strangest thing happens when you leave a place, you learn to love it a little more. Every car ride is a little more enjoyable, every coffee a little bit better and every conversation a little more meaningful. These past couple of months I have realized that. From graduating from Longwood to preparing for this journey I have more than my fair share of goodbyes, some most likely for good and some only temporary.

In an attempt to be as efficient as possible I attempted to master the steps to the perfect goodbye, only to realize there is no such thing. I have found in these last two months that there is no one way to say goodbye to the people who mean the world to me. I have found that with each goodbye they are getting harder and harder and not easier. When I left Longwood and my friends on campus I believed this was going to be the hardest of them all, however it came and went and I took with me my diploma and a series of lessons I will never forget. When I returned home I met with childhood friends and when it came time for them to return to school those goodbyes were a bit more difficult, but for us 10+ years of friendship wouldn’t be deterred by a short stint in the Peace Corps. So on I went. When it came time to saying goodbye to local friendships it was a bit more difficult. Friends who surprised me along the way, who I met through a summertime job and subsequently became major parts of my daily life (and caffeine intake).

Finally, when it came down to saying goodbye to my home, my family and my life as I knew it things got a lot more difficult. With this goodbye came the realization that this wasn’t a goodbye just to these people but to the life I lived, at home with my parents. This was the true end to my post university life, and the real introduction to my life as an independent me. The thing I have realized is that the goodbyes I am saying have shown me what impact and value others have brought to my life. The difficult nature of each additional goodbye is comforting because it shows me that no matter the distance I am not alone in this world. I am not under the impression that each and every relationship, friendship or situation will be the exact same when I return, as I hope it is not. What I do hope is that as I embark on this journey of service, adventure and self-discovery that this community I have built will be a part of all of my major life moments.

So this might have be goodbye for now, but its hello to a new chapter in life and a beautiful road ahead.

Farewell to 2016

As we sit here celebrating the conclusion and beginning of a new year I’ve realized that this is truly a farewell. Whether you are sitting drinking champagne and waiting for the ball to drop among family, out for a night to remember or working (like me), its a true farewell. A Farewell to 2016. A Farewell to the mistakes we have undoubtedly made at some point this year. A Farewell to the bad choices. A Farewell to the heartbreak that seems to come far too often. Most of all with the end of 2016 make sure to leave the mistakes you made throughout 2016 in the rear view mirror and with that comes A LOT of responsibility. The responsibility to yourself in a new year.

2016 was however, not all bad. 2016 lead to a lot of good choices, good relationships and overall taught me that sometimes the best things in life are unable to be planned. This year taught me that sometimes what we expected our lives to be at a certain point is nothing more than an expectation. It’s not a requirement or a thing we must achieve. It’s a misguided interpretation of what society expects of us.

So in 2017, firstly, we must take this understanding with us. We must understand that no matter the challenges, no matter the determination we will not be able to meet each and every expectation we have for ourselves. We must go back to the mindset where each and EVERY achievement no matter the size or the difficulty is important. We must go back to the mindset we had when we were learning our ABC’s or learning how to ride a bike, where each and every milestone was validated and important. Despite the fact that with every passing year we continue to age, we cannot let our 5 year old selves get away from us. We must take in stride the obstacles that 2017 is bound to throw our way, and take those on. We must secondly, respect our choices. Just because 2016 is over doesn’t mean that the choices we made in 2016 no longer matter. Too often when people take on the “new year, new me” motto they insist on neglecting their past choices.

2016 is indeed over, but 2017 is just beginning. Take with you your past and never forget you deserve forgiveness. Happy 2017!

Farewell to Longwood U.

As I sit here and reflect on my journey at Longwood I have realized that is been a strange one. Even as I sit here in the bottom of Ruffner waiting for a last meeting of the year, I hear the Longwood choir break out into Christmas carols. It’s a sad farewell. Farewell to the life I have built. It’s a weird concept finally being done with something you thought would never end. It’s a weird idea realizing that everything you do is the last time you’ll do it. It’s become routine and graduation has proved to be anything but routine. I am graduating early and therefore have not gotten that “typical” wrap up that most college graduates receive. I have had to adjust my time frame because of my official acceptance into the Peace Corps. I am departing in February and thus finishing my degree early turned out to be extremely conducive. I have learned that there’s a lot involved in this transition. I have been planning so much I have more often than not failed to look up from my computer, my agenda and my pile of work.

I looked up today and I realized it is all over. It has ended and I wasn’t even truly aware it had begun. I had planned to do so many things before I graduated. I had goals. I had so much left to do. But today, I am saying goodbye to it all. I am at a loss, which for me is a surprise to say the least. Even sitting here now I cannot decide what these feelings about departing even truly mean. I am attempting to put my ideas into words on this screen right now and cannot. I think the saying that life happens when we least expect it to, is more appropriate than ever. I have learned that not only does life get away from us but often planning for every bump along the road creates a lack of true appreciation for the beauty of it all.

My advice to those of my friends and classmates still at Longwood would be to enjoy each and every late night, cram session and quirky professor. My advice to those only now entering university would be to absorb everything. Don’t take any of the new experiences for granted. I am so excited to get my life going and embark on my Peace Corps adventure, but I am dreading leaving Farmville, VA for the last time as a Longwood student. It’s a tearful goodbye to Longwood.

Woah. Adulting.

“At the end of life we will not be judged by how many diplomas we have received, how much money we have made, how many great things we have done.
We will be judged by “I was hungry, and you gave me something to eat, I was naked and you clothed me. I was homeless, and you took me in.”
― Mother Teresa

So for many of you you know that this last semester has been anything but easy for me. Long days turned into on my all nighters, I was struggling with acclimating on my campus and dealing with the frustrating aspects of being over involved on my campus. I missed a lot this semester because of the stress and at times just wanted to get back on a plane and get back on my South African adventure. I began this semester seriously considering a life as a Peace Corps Volunteer. I began researching my options, which countries, job openings and so on. I finally found three that appealed to me and began the journey of applying, deciding which one was my first choice and filling out the application that could either begin my journey or deter me from a life of service. Throughout the process I only told my closest friends and family that I had applied (as to not get embarrassed if I did not get chosen). After a few months waiting to hear I was granted an interview for which I was beyond nervous for. I realized that I wanted this more than anything and as the pressure continued to rise so did my passion for the Peace Corps. The more I had to research in preparation the more I knew these were my kind of people.

Following a lovely (and very constructive) interview/conversation I was both nervous and confident in my interview. I was surprised to be chosen for my first choice (which I assumed I was not qualified for) and was content with my performance in my first official professional interview. I was told I would be notified of a decision by September 1st, and as the semester wound down I found myself in for a long summer of waiting and putting graduate school applications on hold. I was more than surprised when a week into my summer break I received an email late at night from the Peace Corps! I WAS ACCEPTED. I didn’t know whether I should cry or finally sleep. It was after all around 11:45PM and I was in the middle of a conversation with a friend who was heading back to South Africa the next day. I was more than overwhelmed but in all the best ways.

I realized that night that adventure has once again found my life. I am so honored to be chosen to partake in this experience in the Dominican Republic and embark on yet another journey. This time I will be gone for 27 months, working and serving local communities in the Dominican and couldn’t be happier to do so. Graduating early and not having that formal graduation ceremony has been something that I was battling with, and now I know that with the guidance of those around me and my faith I am truly fulfilling my life’s mission. Everything that happens really happens at the right times.

I will begin keeping track of all of the steps I will be embarking on in this new journey and am excited to share the experience with all of those who followed my time in South Africa. I am so grateful still to that beautiful country, CIS Abroad for helping me fulfill my dream of going there and everyone who helped me find my true mission on this Earth.

 

 

 

Travel Tips

So as you may or may not know I am EXHAUSTED. REVERSE CULTURE SHOCK IS A THING. Returning to life without wanderlust is difficult but another adventure. As you consider your potential or impending adventure I urge you to take in every moment. I will begin my travel tips with a wise quote “It is better to travel well than to arrive.” You will soon see this couldn’t be more true.

1. Prepare your family, before you begin packing or buying all of the cute travel gear you can find talk to your family. Talk about your trip, research their questions and begin a dialogue between you and your support system (after all when you get on that airplane you are leaving them behind and their comfort is extremely important).
2. Research for yourself. Research the weather when you arrive, while you are there and right before you leave. This will help you prepare the amount and types of clothing necessary. For me South Africa went through every season and I was totally prepared for everything but the 115 degree heat.
3. Prepare on social media, look up #(insert location here) to get an idea of where you are going, what kind of people are there and even get some ideas of where to travel while you are abroad. The time will go by so quickly so have some ideas of what you want to see before you even begin packing.
4. When you start packing don’t STRESS. I know this is hard considering some of us were gone for a semester or even a year, but it is very simple and if you don’t bring enough clothes there are always cheap thrift stores or places local students can show you to pick up necessities.
5. Most of all don’t overthink any of it. I am a planner and over thinker but for me this process taught me that nothing can be planned. As much planning as I thought I had done, I would soon after departing learn that no planning would really truly prepare me for the amazing adventure to come.

Even now, as I write this list I know some will say its very simple and not the STEP BY STEP list they were looking for when they think of travel tips. However, these tips will make sure that instead of over planning, over thinking and over packing you are blessed with the cultural experience before you. You have or about to make an amazing decision that will define who you are, change your world view and make you a stronger global citizen. Embrace it.

Goodbye for now.

  We have moments in life that define us. Moments where we figure out who we are, where we are going and who we want to be. I owe many of those moments to South Africa. To the country that gave me its all. The country that showed me who I want to be, the kind of person I am and above all taught me that I am the best me there ever was. I am happy to say 6 months later I didn’t get attacked by a lion but fell in love. I fell in love with my life again. As a college student often we get so distracted by the craziness/stress that is our normal we don’t take the time to enjoy our youth. As I say goodbye to South Africa I will soon say goodbye to 20. 20 has been an amazing. Year and whilst in South Africa I’ve made lifelong friends, seen true African beauty, and reconnected with old friends. I’ve found a life here in South Africa, I found my comfort zones and even though it looked grim for a while I adjusted to this new place. As I say goodbye I wonder what will be he hardest thing to say goodbye to. Will it be the beauty of Stellenbosch and the mountains outside of my window every morning, my quirky friends who taught me what it means to fight for their rights to equal opportunity and for the rights of others? Will it be my new Durban family who truly taught me what hospitality and true friendship is? I am not sure what I will miss the most but I know I will miss it all and so much more. As I journey back to my family and my home, I realize that despite the shortness of this adventure I’ve learned so much more than I could have ever hoped about life. I have to thank South Africa for granting me the opportunity to not only witness it’s beauty but it’s flaws. It helped uncloud my eyes. I truly had a false idea of this county and its many flaws allowed me to see that similarly to my homeland it has flaws abundant. Flaws that might prevent some from loving it or appreciating its many many amazing aspects. I no longer have a false impression of South Africa. I see this country for what it is, and at the end of the day love this country and its people equally. I will never be able to put to words my gratitude for those who made this trip what it was for me. The new friends I made along the way that taught me the truest definition of beauty. To the reconnection with friends from exchange in high school who showed me that hospitality runs both ways and that distance and time doesn’t have to impact friendship. I don’t think I will go back home the same person because I’ve given a part of my heart to South Africa. So for now I’m saying goodbye to this place, my experiences but I’m saying hello to the next stage in my life. So South Africa I will see you later, I will be back to soak up more of the African sun. Totsiens Suid Afrika!